Holy Expectancy

I was reading in my Advent Study, yes, I started it already.  It helps prepare my heart to share with you.  The study challenged me today, this idea of holy expectancy.  It shared the story of Zechariah and Elizabeth and how they remained faithful as they held onto the hope of a baby.

I sat with this question for a long time.  Do I have a holy expectancy as Zechariah and Elisabeth did?  Am I waiting and longing for God to move greatly in my life? The sad thing was, I don’t. I couldn’t think of even a small level of expectancy.  I feel like I got to this place of peace and gratitude.  I got really good at resting in “thy will be done” that I stopped dreaming. Stopped the urge to wonder or planning for a grand purpose.  It could be as a mom that my mind shifted focus to helping raise my children and supporting my husband which could be my defense, but I think I even lost my holy expectancy with that and just started going through the motions. 

The problem is as I sit here I can’t break through my self-limiting thoughts.  I can’t even stir my heart to want or desire.  The author talked about the balance of holy contentment and holy expectancy.  Right now I lean real heavy to the holy contentment which is beautiful in and of itself but God desires more for us.  A holy longing.  

That’s the thing with advent studies.  They stir the heart and start to prepare us.  They make room for the wonder and excitement of Christmas.  Not the excitement of decorations and tinsel but the excitement for God and what He is making anew.  The crazy thing is, the world leans in the most during this season, God is everywhere in the secular world, but as Christians our distractions tend to be the greatest this time of year.

My prayer for each of us is that we sit with a holy contentment this Christmas as we navigate the crazy season yet we long with a great desire for God to move.  Move in our life, our hearts, and in those around us.  May we live with a holy expectancy.  And in my case… just ask God to move and create a holy expectancy within me.

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